This Spring (2013), Emily and I each celebrated our second
Mother’s and Father’s Day as bereaved parents.
I don’t want to waste the reader’s time lamenting Gabriel’s home-going
except to say we miss our “Little Lambie and Handsome.”
Who I do want to spend our time together discussing is the
incredible group of men of which I know find myself a part. I know of no father who, if asked, would
volunteer to raise a child with severe disabilities or medical frailties. I know of no father who, if
asked, would seek membership into the even smaller number of which I am now a
part. Yet, in the face of tragic events;
many of these men have risen above that which in themselves they are capable.
One of my new friends will be participating in an Ironman
Triathlon to raise awareness of Group B Strep.
I recently listened to a video conference involving men representing
various groups which seek to shine light on the fallacies which believe men
should not grieve openly or in public.
And my mentor has been publishing Christian children’s musicals for some
time. So, through no effort on my part,
I am now in the company of some great men.
But, I have often wondered in the last sixteen months why we
believe struggles in life should be the exception rather than the rule. Why is it that Christians around the world
will flock in the thousands to hear the teachings of individuals who espouse
the view that God wants us to materially prosper? I find no supporting references in the Bible.
Jesus teaches us in John 16:33, “I have said these things to
you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But
take heart; I have overcome the world.”
So if Jesus is to be believed, we should actually expect trials and
tribulations in the world. This is interesting! Why would a loving God allow His children to
experience such things? Why do earthly
fathers allow their children to experience hardship?
Again, we turn to scripture to find our answers. James 1:2-4 exhorts us, “Count it all joy, my
brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing
of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full
effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.”
Romans 5:3-5 tells us essentially the same. “More than that, we rejoice in our sufferings,
knowing that suffering produces endurance, and endurance produces character,
and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God's
love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given
to us.”
Yes, I can hear some of you now. “Glen, you said that we should not be
surprised if we have trials and tribulations.
But now you are also telling us that we should celebrate the
trials.” Well friends, I can’t take credit
for saying that! God’s Word says
it! Our trials build strength of
character in each of us. And even more
importantly responding well to trials brings glory to our God in Heaven.
Each of the men I mentioned above and I are grieving the
loss of a child. Grief is not counter-intuitive to Christianity as some would have you believe. We love our children who have gone before
us. The depth of our grief is testimony
to the depth of a father’s love for his child.
But how we grieve and how we pass through the days which follow our loss
builds character and glorifies God.
